Mr. Wedding Band Guitar Player (audio)

Bud Light Presents: Real Men of Genius
(real men of genius)
Today we salute you, Mr. Wedding Band Guitar Player.
(Mr. Wedding Band Guitar Player)
Any guitar player can rock a packed stadium but it takes real talent to keep the Wishinski reception going all night long.
(Mazal Tov) Perched on the stage in your undersized tuxedo, you tirelessly churn out tunes from the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's and 90's.
(Keep on rockin')
Sound check? You don't need no stinking sound check.
(No!)
And even though you've never had groupies, you have bagged the occasional bridesmaid.
(Never forget you!)
So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light, guitar guy, because every wedding you go to, you're the real best man.
(Mr. Wedding Band Guitar Player)

The pace of economic growth slowed markedly in the second quarter, the government reported today, and revised figures show that the recession that began in March of last year was twice as deep as originally estimated.

 

From SatireWire.com

Beijing (SatireWire.com) — Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil," Libya, China, and Syria today announced they had formed the "Axis of Just as Evil," which they said would be way eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of his State of the Union address.

From "When designers ignore consumers, products can flop" by Jim Hopkins, USA TODA

Cheaper electronics mean designers can combine many features in a single product. That leads to gizmos such as cell phones that also access the Internet, have calendars, address books and video-game players.

Marketers often don't know how to sell many-function devices, and consumers can't figure out what they are, Cogliandro says.

Also, consumers get frustrated because they're paying for features they don't want. "The process of innovation becomes like a drug and (designers) want it all,"...